March comes again..
Month of summer. Month that out goers are waiting for.
Month of fire prevention. Many homes and industries suffers from burn destruction.
Month of recognition & graduation day. Most honor and graduating students are waiting for.
March. How many March has come into my life? This year it is the 14th time I'll be hugging this month, whether I like it or not. For my first 6 March, I could say they were a big success for me eventhough my only merit is being a first honors student, aside from winning the 4th place feature writing contest that my adviser is one of the judges, nothing else. My elementary life never become that easy and maintaining my first honors become my priority. I never had planned it. I could still remember how my grade one teacher had asked me to call my mama only to tell her that I'm the first honor in the class. Grade one, it was my first time to get in school and since I never had enrolled in kinder or nursery, just my mama who had taught me how to read and write, I was placed in section B because section A is only for those who had finished kinder. I have no care for those things that time. I'm just happy being a gradeschool student with my first pad paper and thick black pencil that my mama got in her store for me. I'm with my daddy when I enrolled in grade one. Like my mama told me, I should be attentive and active in class. That's why in my first day of the class, I raised my hand when our teacher had asked a volunteer from us to introduce ourself. I did the first move that time. I wonder, I'm not usually like that today. After having myself introduced, a seatmate of mine had introduce herself to me, and she become one of my school "best friend".
For months, I become recognized in the school. That's why a section A teacher had asked me to enroll to her class next school year, which I did but she failed me just to save the youngest son of her co-teacher that is also a first honor and she don't want me to compete with him.
In grade three, the first honors of this student ended when i "beat" him up, as what my teacher says. After that, he never had continued his study as his father says he was still young for school. Grade four, another life in me begins when I met the honor students of other sections. Challenges become rigid and I'm doing all the possible and legal ways to achieve honor. I don't know how I find honors so tasty after I had tasted it in my first grade.
Years after years, I become first honors in my elementary life. Become a valedictorian is one of my dream that time. I saw the other valedictorians who were stepping up on the stage and being necklaced with different gold medals. Medals. I'm hunger for it. Honors. It makes me happy. I achieve it.
After elementary graduation, I'm still wondering. Do I really deserve this honor? Do I really deserve it? (Well,there's so many people who is achieving what they don't deserve.)
I could be one of the previous valedictorians who graduated in our school without giving the school a bunch of awards in different competitions, quiz bee, math competition, poster making contest, journalism, I lose them all. I never had won. I got ashame. Could I call myself a respectful valedictorian?
Whatever could be the reason Father gave me what I had prayed for and He thinks I deserve it. I'm not an inborn genius. Father had just lend me a little skill.
My high school life changed my world. It was a nightmare to belong in the class where your classmates are all valedictorian, salutatorian and honor students. Competition are tighter. We have all hunger for good grades. And this environment makes me insane. I always come home tired and sleepy. It's hard to study like this, i shouldn't want to get 85/100 or I'll be the dorkest student in the class. Minimum goal shall be 90/100.
I never achieve this. It was my greatest failure. I failed to be even in top ten percent. I'm 4th to the last in rank. My nightmares. I cried. I broke my scholarship just like my other classmates who had lose their's and find their own life in other school. They were ended up.
I come to think: "How it should be if I didn't enrolled in that private school with good standard and study in public, could I still become honor student?"
Well, I'm a foolish one. Maybe it should really happen and it was my destiny. I should be thankful that I had studied in a good-standard school. I learned many things that other students didn't learned. And met people, teachers and friends who are memorable.
But I never can stop to think of comparing myself with others. One of my friend had lose and regain her scholarship again and reunite with section one because she become an academic achiever. I'm still on top 3 in my second year but sad to tell, I never had achieve the grade for an academic achiever.
I just continue my fight until I reach 4th year. I always longing to become an academic achiever. But in my sorrowful distress, my close friends achieve what I am longing to achieve. Maybe it's really not for me. I should be thankful for the moments when:
Month of summer. Month that out goers are waiting for.
Month of fire prevention. Many homes and industries suffers from burn destruction.
Month of recognition & graduation day. Most honor and graduating students are waiting for.
March. How many March has come into my life? This year it is the 14th time I'll be hugging this month, whether I like it or not. For my first 6 March, I could say they were a big success for me eventhough my only merit is being a first honors student, aside from winning the 4th place feature writing contest that my adviser is one of the judges, nothing else. My elementary life never become that easy and maintaining my first honors become my priority. I never had planned it. I could still remember how my grade one teacher had asked me to call my mama only to tell her that I'm the first honor in the class. Grade one, it was my first time to get in school and since I never had enrolled in kinder or nursery, just my mama who had taught me how to read and write, I was placed in section B because section A is only for those who had finished kinder. I have no care for those things that time. I'm just happy being a gradeschool student with my first pad paper and thick black pencil that my mama got in her store for me. I'm with my daddy when I enrolled in grade one. Like my mama told me, I should be attentive and active in class. That's why in my first day of the class, I raised my hand when our teacher had asked a volunteer from us to introduce ourself. I did the first move that time. I wonder, I'm not usually like that today. After having myself introduced, a seatmate of mine had introduce herself to me, and she become one of my school "best friend".
For months, I become recognized in the school. That's why a section A teacher had asked me to enroll to her class next school year, which I did but she failed me just to save the youngest son of her co-teacher that is also a first honor and she don't want me to compete with him.
In grade three, the first honors of this student ended when i "beat" him up, as what my teacher says. After that, he never had continued his study as his father says he was still young for school. Grade four, another life in me begins when I met the honor students of other sections. Challenges become rigid and I'm doing all the possible and legal ways to achieve honor. I don't know how I find honors so tasty after I had tasted it in my first grade.
Years after years, I become first honors in my elementary life. Become a valedictorian is one of my dream that time. I saw the other valedictorians who were stepping up on the stage and being necklaced with different gold medals. Medals. I'm hunger for it. Honors. It makes me happy. I achieve it.
After elementary graduation, I'm still wondering. Do I really deserve this honor? Do I really deserve it? (Well,there's so many people who is achieving what they don't deserve.)
I could be one of the previous valedictorians who graduated in our school without giving the school a bunch of awards in different competitions, quiz bee, math competition, poster making contest, journalism, I lose them all. I never had won. I got ashame. Could I call myself a respectful valedictorian?
Whatever could be the reason Father gave me what I had prayed for and He thinks I deserve it. I'm not an inborn genius. Father had just lend me a little skill.
My high school life changed my world. It was a nightmare to belong in the class where your classmates are all valedictorian, salutatorian and honor students. Competition are tighter. We have all hunger for good grades. And this environment makes me insane. I always come home tired and sleepy. It's hard to study like this, i shouldn't want to get 85/100 or I'll be the dorkest student in the class. Minimum goal shall be 90/100.
I never achieve this. It was my greatest failure. I failed to be even in top ten percent. I'm 4th to the last in rank. My nightmares. I cried. I broke my scholarship just like my other classmates who had lose their's and find their own life in other school. They were ended up.
I come to think: "How it should be if I didn't enrolled in that private school with good standard and study in public, could I still become honor student?"
Well, I'm a foolish one. Maybe it should really happen and it was my destiny. I should be thankful that I had studied in a good-standard school. I learned many things that other students didn't learned. And met people, teachers and friends who are memorable.
But I never can stop to think of comparing myself with others. One of my friend had lose and regain her scholarship again and reunite with section one because she become an academic achiever. I'm still on top 3 in my second year but sad to tell, I never had achieve the grade for an academic achiever.
I just continue my fight until I reach 4th year. I always longing to become an academic achiever. But in my sorrowful distress, my close friends achieve what I am longing to achieve. Maybe it's really not for me. I should be thankful for the moments when:
My English teacher had asked me:"What happened to you?" When I got 85/100 in English. I feel like tearing the paper apart that time in my shame. That's because I'm the most active participants in English recitations in our class that time and I'm expected to be the highest in English.
My first&fourth year classmate had asked me: "Ba't ganyan grade mo?" When I got a low but not failing grade in our summative. Someone said "Yabang naman neto..". He said, "Hindi, kasi matalino siya.." He knows me, and I understand him. He just like me when we are first year always answering in recitation in a "trying-hard" manner. He's salutatorian and in my same fate.
I become sad at first when I hear things of expectation but then will feel happy to realize that they were expecting something from me. It means that I'm worthy. I shouldn't be sad but get striving harder.
Like what echoes in my ear, the teachings of my beloved 2nd year English teacher, "Don't compare yourself with others. You have different qualities from others."
Yes, I may not be an inborn genius. But I have the luckiest fate ever had. My Father must have the right to take away what He had lend me. I get down on my knees but He never leaves me. He always answer my prayers and just give me the things I need. I bow on His greatness. I may be down whenever I saw my close friend achieve things I want to have. A friend of mine in my grade 3 class in our public school is not an honor student but since she transferred in her 4th grade to the private school where I studied HS, she become academic achiever in 4th year. Yeah, all of my close friends, since high school until college, they got the academic achievements and I'm very happy for them. School quality really matters, also the inborn talents.
My first&fourth year classmate had asked me: "Ba't ganyan grade mo?" When I got a low but not failing grade in our summative. Someone said "Yabang naman neto..". He said, "Hindi, kasi matalino siya.." He knows me, and I understand him. He just like me when we are first year always answering in recitation in a "trying-hard" manner. He's salutatorian and in my same fate.
I become sad at first when I hear things of expectation but then will feel happy to realize that they were expecting something from me. It means that I'm worthy. I shouldn't be sad but get striving harder.
Like what echoes in my ear, the teachings of my beloved 2nd year English teacher, "Don't compare yourself with others. You have different qualities from others."
Yes, I may not be an inborn genius. But I have the luckiest fate ever had. My Father must have the right to take away what He had lend me. I get down on my knees but He never leaves me. He always answer my prayers and just give me the things I need. I bow on His greatness. I may be down whenever I saw my close friend achieve things I want to have. A friend of mine in my grade 3 class in our public school is not an honor student but since she transferred in her 4th grade to the private school where I studied HS, she become academic achiever in 4th year. Yeah, all of my close friends, since high school until college, they got the academic achievements and I'm very happy for them. School quality really matters, also the inborn talents.
Every March, i'm in my sorrowful distress. I cried in agony. I am longing for honor.
But then come to think. Do all honor students succeed? No. Do all genius become invulnerable? No. Do honors always make you reputable? No. Do earthly intelligence has a great thing to do with the riches in heaven? of course NO. To inherit the land of Father, you don't need to become intelligent in earthly things. You should have the wisdom of His words, that is, the Truth. You should know the truth of His words.... And I'm lucky, I possess it. We, Iglesia Ni Cristo possess that.
Now, another March had come, shall I live in agony again?
Course, No. I'm Iglesia Ni Cristo and I'm one of the most very luckiest person in the world.
'Cause really, they were more special things that Father had prepared for me. Even in this world while the end is not yet coming. I know He prepared a very special gift. I am always praying to Father that may I have achieve the 'thing' for me in the right time.
Course, No. I'm Iglesia Ni Cristo and I'm one of the most very luckiest person in the world.
'Cause really, they were more special things that Father had prepared for me. Even in this world while the end is not yet coming. I know He prepared a very special gift. I am always praying to Father that may I have achieve the 'thing' for me in the right time.
In my next article, I'll be telling the world why I'm one of the most luckiest persons who is now living on earth. More intelligent than the most genius, richer than the richest, stronger than the most powerful. I'm one of those, "chosen one".
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